If you're going to call me a heretic, please don't read this blog.

Last night I had a break down for a lot of ambiguous and unspoken reasons of an emotional nature that I will choose not to divulge on this public web page for the very fact that it is public and the ambiguous things of the emotional nature are currently egg-shell like and ready to be smashed in my face, which I would prefer not to happen for obvious reasons. I am a writer, but I am also not keen about spilling my personal life to the world free for the judgments and taking of all who choose. No, I'll just cry to husband.

But that's not my point.

After this long and ambiguous emotional breakdown, I decided to investigate the graduate school application process here, at the BYU.

And it led to another emotional breakdown.

Because.

The average GPA for acceptance into the BYU graduate school English department is 3.72.

Oh, did you notice? 3.72.
Like that Biology test that you studied for 5043 hours for and got a B on? Not good enough. Really.
3.72.

Um, excuse me BYU for not maintaining a 3.72 GPA-- I had spiritual things to discover, social things to figure out, weddings, financial troubles, engagement (just one), best friends, good byes, work, and a whole crap load of experience that makes my GPA not quite that awesome. Okay? Thanks.

Apparently, though, there are 30 people that are accepted into the Masters of English program every year that maintain that GPA, PLUS having skyrocketing GRE scores, plus running 12 miles every day, plus only eating organic meat and salads, plus ironing their jeans, plus getting published 342554 times, plus... well, you get my point.

Obviously, I'm generalizing, stereotyping, and being downright obnoxious. But can you blame me? I spent my first year at BYU attempting to major in business by taking all of the math prerequisites. It shot my GPA, my self-esteem, and my plans to go into marketing.

But guess what? I found out what I really wanted to do. Want to do.

And now, from the BYU website, I am being told that I am not good enough to do just that, because of a process of self-discovery that occurred while I was here. I'm not perfect. I'm flawed. Extremely. But I feel like sometimes BYU expects perfection. Spiritual perfection. Intellectual perfection. Physical perfection. Elitests.

Excuse me, for being human, BYU.


That being said, though, I must say that I absolutely love BYU. I love a billion things about it. I have received a fantastic edumacation here, met some amazing people, had some breathtaking experiences-- and none of those things can be degraded, or SHOULD be degraded because I probably won't get into their English program. I'm true blue, cougar to the soul, and it will always be that way.

So, the heretical part.

I looked up University of Utah's grad school programs.

Now before all of you fellow cougars flinch and bawl and leave this page, hear me out.

Their required GPA is 3.0. 3.0 is a beautiful GPA. Get a few Bs, get a few As, get a few Cs, live a little, and on to graduate school it is. I can do 3.0. Another thing-- it tells me exactly how much it will cost to go, and it is only a small amount more than the amount I am currently paying for tuition. I'm not sure of BYU's prices, but I've heard horror stories. The actual amounts aren't available on the website. Plus, I've heard that it's a good idea to do graduate studies away from your undergraduate university. More diversity, or something.

So there it is. Come fall of 2011, it is very possible that I could be a graduate student at the university I have cheered against for the sum total of the years that make up my life.


Don't fret my lovely cougars,
For I am blue, through and through.
But I value education, too. :)





{how could byu give up such extreme poetics from a writer like myself? heavens. poor souls. hehe}